It’s been 15 months since the twins came into our lives and yet, in many ways, I feel as though I experienced today one of the first moments of family-time for the Porter-Gardners. I know that isn’t entirely true. That we have been a family from the moment Willow and Theo emerged from my belly, ever since Suzanne cut their umbilical cords and they stopped being extensions of me. I know that when we paddled through the rain dragging extra canoes ladened with our gear to get to the island on Joeperry Lake for our wedding, our first camping trip together, we were on our first familial adventure. That our weekend on Georgian Bay with the Hatchers was our first family cottage weekend. That our time in Spain is only the first of our family holidays on this side of the ocean. I understand that we have been a family now since the evening of April 2, 2012. But, today there was something different over the lunch table as we sat down to eat. Paella.
It’s been months of challenging Theo with new foods, which he accepts readily — even greedily. And months of trying to get Willow to eat a satisfying variety of foods. She likes to do it herself — cheerios work well for that, as does cheese…until she rules cheese out for some reason. Toast is usually good unless feeding herself porridge seems like a better option, or rather spreading porridge all over her pyjamas and tray as she tries to forge the gap between spoon and mouth. She is becoming more coordinated, definitely and quickly. But, feeding these two is full-time work. For two people. One has to keep pace with Theo. The other has to do sprints between the kitchen and table as she searches for what might entice Willow. Today was different. We sat together to eat paella — the four of us enjoying our meal at once. Likely Theo ate twice as much as anyone else, but that’s okay. Likely it’s how it will go.
I’m sure we could have done this sooner. We’ve known it’s important to eat together, that there are the soft benefits of eating as a family that build foundations for quality time together and the concrete benefits of modelling good eating habits. But, eating together would imply a level of preparation that has been elusive. When the kids go down for their morning naps — yes, they still nap twice a day, phewf — lunch should be prepped so it’s ready upon their awakening. Usually, however, Suzanne and I busy ourselves cleaning up from the morning breakfast, play session and perhaps finish laundry etc. after which point we collapse and decide to rest as well. Nap when they nap. Perhaps it’s the Spanish influence — promoting the siesta. And, if we don’t nap, we enjoying doing other things — communicating with family and friends, reading, organizing photos, all those selfish passtimes that have somehow become luxuries. Today, however, I decided to cook.
Paella is easy and is a one-shot deal. One pan — one pan to clean. One serving — scoop and eat. From the pan to the mouth. One meal time — finally the four of us around the table together. After our paella out on the terrace this afternoon, I’m converted. I like how it feels to be a family around the table in our own home — not only the family on adventure, on tour, out visiting, on the camino — but a family that can sit still.
Too bad we’ll soon have to relinquish morning naps. Uh oh.